Dreams in a Box
So yesterday was good, we met with Simon's new school, and although I'm still sad he didn't make the cut for the normal preschool, we reviewed his speech testing scores and it was quite a pick-me-up to have him score at 2.5 to 3 year old level. Simon will be 4 in two months. A year ago he was testing between 9-20 months.
Maybe I've come a long way too. Scores that reflected that type of delay a year ago made me flip out. I would argue about the test, I would fight all this, I was fighting everything. I thought they were wrong, but I knew Simon wasn't quite right. So I was really in a bind.
So he's testing pretty good, but still does do poorly in a classroom setting, and the therapy preschool will help with that. BB is a good school, and they'll help me take a look at what's going on at JC (his regular school) by having a pro go in and observe, and we'll figure out how to get more out of it. BB also provides aids for the classroom. He'll also do speech therapy at BB. I'm the luckiest mom around to be in a big city (Chicago) and have a one-stop-shop for everything my son needs a few blocks from my house.
So today is a good day. Today I feel like my son is in good shape. He woke up yesterday, talking and making sense, hitting language fast balls out of the park . It reminds me where we were a year ago, with 100% of his language being scripted. I've become a convert to early intervention, it does seem like the earlier you get your kid intensive help, the more it pays off. My friend's gir, Is, seemed to be heading towards an Autism diagnosis, (a downgrade from PDD spectrum). Her mom had been getting her tons of services since the age of 3. But Is is really doing well in kindergarten, her head is lifted and she's looking around, she's jumping on me in the pool, squealing, answering questions.
It seems like for these kids, the main issue is that the world inside their heads is good, and the world outside their head is such chaos that they can't wait to get back inside their heads again. Once that "lift" happens, and they like the world, then the door opens. The can learn, things are enjoyable. I've seen a lot of kids make a lot of improvement. And I feel hope for the other kids. I was watching a kid through the video feel that looked pretty classicly autistic. He came out for a bathroom break, looked at the floorboard and said "broken".
I thought to myself. That kids can say at least one word. If he can say one word, he can say more. With enough words, he can talk.
A lot has happened in a year. I am grateful for all the help I have received and the good things that have happened in addition. I'm continually gratefull Simon's disabilities are as mild as they are. But I've also made some type of transition. I am drinking green tea, I have a cold, and thinking about Asha and how she taught me the Japanese Tea ceremony. Back then, I sat on the floor and tried to let go of the self. The Zen masters should try parenting in addition to meditation. I'm glad my goal was to let go of the ego, because in helping Simon I have let go of many many things I wanted to do. I had to let go of self-reliance, ambition, my goals. I keep my dreams in a box.
I measure my life not in just what I have accomplished, but by what I have sacrificed. We measure our success by our achievements, but the heroes among us are those who have sacrificed in order to help others, in order to do right. In that way I have done a good job. When we did the medical diagnostic last November, I pulled Simon out of daycare the next day and we never went back. I made a financial plan with my parents, I let go of work ambitions and outside projects and took care of my son in a way I never had before. I was a mother in a way I had never been before.
But still, at the end of the day, I wished I had done it sooner. I wish I wouldn't have rationalized all the signs. I wish I would have asked doctors rather than surf the Internet for answers. I wish I would have played with Simon more when he was a year old, and not just let him sit with his electonic toys.
Maybe all parents of quirky and spectrum kids wish these things.
Kathryn
Maybe I've come a long way too. Scores that reflected that type of delay a year ago made me flip out. I would argue about the test, I would fight all this, I was fighting everything. I thought they were wrong, but I knew Simon wasn't quite right. So I was really in a bind.
So he's testing pretty good, but still does do poorly in a classroom setting, and the therapy preschool will help with that. BB is a good school, and they'll help me take a look at what's going on at JC (his regular school) by having a pro go in and observe, and we'll figure out how to get more out of it. BB also provides aids for the classroom. He'll also do speech therapy at BB. I'm the luckiest mom around to be in a big city (Chicago) and have a one-stop-shop for everything my son needs a few blocks from my house.
So today is a good day. Today I feel like my son is in good shape. He woke up yesterday, talking and making sense, hitting language fast balls out of the park . It reminds me where we were a year ago, with 100% of his language being scripted. I've become a convert to early intervention, it does seem like the earlier you get your kid intensive help, the more it pays off. My friend's gir, Is, seemed to be heading towards an Autism diagnosis, (a downgrade from PDD spectrum). Her mom had been getting her tons of services since the age of 3. But Is is really doing well in kindergarten, her head is lifted and she's looking around, she's jumping on me in the pool, squealing, answering questions.
It seems like for these kids, the main issue is that the world inside their heads is good, and the world outside their head is such chaos that they can't wait to get back inside their heads again. Once that "lift" happens, and they like the world, then the door opens. The can learn, things are enjoyable. I've seen a lot of kids make a lot of improvement. And I feel hope for the other kids. I was watching a kid through the video feel that looked pretty classicly autistic. He came out for a bathroom break, looked at the floorboard and said "broken".
I thought to myself. That kids can say at least one word. If he can say one word, he can say more. With enough words, he can talk.
A lot has happened in a year. I am grateful for all the help I have received and the good things that have happened in addition. I'm continually gratefull Simon's disabilities are as mild as they are. But I've also made some type of transition. I am drinking green tea, I have a cold, and thinking about Asha and how she taught me the Japanese Tea ceremony. Back then, I sat on the floor and tried to let go of the self. The Zen masters should try parenting in addition to meditation. I'm glad my goal was to let go of the ego, because in helping Simon I have let go of many many things I wanted to do. I had to let go of self-reliance, ambition, my goals. I keep my dreams in a box.
I measure my life not in just what I have accomplished, but by what I have sacrificed. We measure our success by our achievements, but the heroes among us are those who have sacrificed in order to help others, in order to do right. In that way I have done a good job. When we did the medical diagnostic last November, I pulled Simon out of daycare the next day and we never went back. I made a financial plan with my parents, I let go of work ambitions and outside projects and took care of my son in a way I never had before. I was a mother in a way I had never been before.
But still, at the end of the day, I wished I had done it sooner. I wish I wouldn't have rationalized all the signs. I wish I would have asked doctors rather than surf the Internet for answers. I wish I would have played with Simon more when he was a year old, and not just let him sit with his electonic toys.
Maybe all parents of quirky and spectrum kids wish these things.
Kathryn
posted by Kathryn711 at 3:03 PM
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